In the immortal words of Rowley Birkin QC (and my dear friend from my Navy Reserve days who did a great impression of the former...), SNAKE!
Let me explain....
On my way back to one of the year 4 classrooms I found a snake making its way into the main building of the school.
It slipped under the door and then obviously found it too cool and turned back around and back down the steps. I stayed with it and managed to get the headmistress' attention. The pest control people were called and we waited and kept guard over the snake. With a squidgey mop.
It was You've Been Framed gold, I tell you. It kept jumping up and nipping the mop, such actions were immediately followed with the headmistress yelping and sweeping the snake to the wall. Poor thing. (Snake, that is!).
And then she asked me to hold the mop...
............!
She went to chase up pest control so I maintained the necessary sweeping, cornering, lassoing, wrestling etc, as you would see on these Nat Geo programmes. Maybe not.
The pest control team (the Boss and his little man with his churn of what he calls 'medicine') arrive eventually. The Boss man says immediately that he will kill it. At this point he raises the deathly squidgey mop glinting in the midday sun, above his head like a medieval executioner...I have to turn around, I just can't watch...except I turn around to the glass door to see Year 4, faces up against the glass...watching the serpentine murder unfold...or splatter...whichever...
So it wasn't quite cutesy Animal Rescue with Rolf Harris. Far from it. We had to assume it was poisonous being on a school and a housing complex so I wonder if this was the only action that could have been taken; just throwing it over the fence to meet its fate on the roads of Oman might have been more humane. And that's saying something.
Wonder what they get climbing up the steps of St. Philip's in Uckfield...?
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